I had something really hit me last week.
I'm on month #9 of recovery. That is a long time to me. I don't sit still well.
I'm 4(going on 5) months out from my cornea transplant but my body is still fighting to recover.
Aren't you glad I don't have pictures of my hurt eye from August? I am--it was horrible. My family claimed they couldn't look at me without their eyes watering.
10. Recovery is SLOW. Just when you think you have it licked it sneaks up on you.
Last Thursday night was the first night of doggie school for Riley. She's huge--90ish pounds. Working with her was almost too much.
I came home exhausted and unable to think or make decisions. Then I figured out that our dinner in the crockpot wasn't completely done--crunchy rice. Ick!
So what is a girl to do? Well I picked the cry on my hubby's shoulder option. He's had to deal with that more than once over the last 9 months. Thankfully its not happening as often.
9. Related to #10. When you are exhausted, you cannot think. I've had to pick the moments of the day that I have energy to get the most important things done. Like school. Like deciding what we are eating for the day/week. My menu planner is INVALUABLE. If its filled out then I don't have to make a decision. Just do what's on the planner.
8. REST is not for wimps. In my mind if I am laying around, then I am being lazy and not doing what I need to do. Yeah well I've had to accept that is a lie. The rules have changed. I must rest.
- Some days that means going back to bed after breakfast.
- Some days that means kids will have to fend for themselves at lunch.
- Some days that means I must accept help from friends and family(who have been absolutely AWESOME!)
- Some days that means supper is not on me. My family is quite capable of fending for themselves. Guess what? No one has starved yet.
7. Stuff that needs doing will wait. Honestly when I sit still it is not a good thing. It means my mind is going a million miles an hour. Planning plotting & dreaming. When I tried to start a project I would run out of steam. The kids could help me with some jobs. Others Steve would handle. Others . . . well they are still on my list of to dos.
6. Small things are HUGE victories.
From Dec to February I couldn't lift or bend over. It seriously cramped my abilities. Creativity was important. I learned to squat to do laundry and getting stuff out of cabinets. But the day I could CARRY the laundry basket instead of kicking it to the washer was SO AWESOME! Silly huh? But it was BIG for me.
5. Frustration builds up. After not doing things for a long while & being patient it is normal to get frustrated and loose it over something small. Again this seems silly but it happens. I tried to focus on what I could do but many days it was difficult..
4. 3 steps forward 2 steps back. Every time I upped my activity level or started doing something that I'd been limited on before I found that I would be exhausted all over again. Or I would get sick. I tried starting my workouts back up after I could bend over. Twice. Yeah two separate times I tried this and I got sick both times. It was too much. So I'm still waiting on that. So I'm still resting. Each day a little less.
3. 8 SOLID hours of sleep every night. And it helps if at least 2 of those hours before midnight. I'm a night owl. I'd rather be up a couple hours when the kids are asleep and it is quiet. I used to survive on 6 hours at least a couple times a week. Nope. Doesn't work.
2. Blessing List. Probably the one thing that kept me sane the first few months when my pain level was HIGH and I didn't know what the outcome would be was keeping a list of the things I was thankful for each day. I posted them on Facebook which kept me to connect with people although I was literally in hibernation. I was VERY light sensitive and not going out much at all.
1. Give yourself grace & be flexible. All the rules have changed. When energy is low don't worry about if the house is clean--just rest. When vision is wonky(this changes day to day) don't try to catch up on grading. Doing things the old way may not work so look for alternatives or ask others to help.
It's funny how the hard things in life make us grow and change. There are more things I've learned about myself but these are the top 10 that I've had to do real battle with to accept.