Day to Day Adventures

What I think when my friends see my dirty house

LifeKim Brush1 Comment

Real Life Confession

What I think when friends came to see my messy house - Day to Day Adventures

Once upon a time I would get incredibly stressed out about the house NEVER being PERFECTLY clean!  If we were having people over, then I would be ultra worried and stressed that the house measured up. 

Things had to be perfect. 

Guess what? 

They never were.

The stress, frustration & anxiety that this would cause for me was HUGE!  I felt like a failure.

MOST important lesson from a dirty house

I realized this in a big way last fall.  I was down and out after my eye infection and had NO energy for house work.  If I was lucky, I would fix a meal or two during the day and then need more rest. 

I wish I had read how to keep your house clean and tidy when you just can't be bothered.  It would have made me laugh.  Hysterically because I couldn't even use her funny methods.

It took MONTHS to get my energy back.  Have you ever been there?  It is so frustrating.

Even if I wanted to clean--I just couldn’t.  

Not if I wanted to continue to heal.

What I think when friends come to see my messy house

Kids and Steve were doing the bare minimum to keep the house running.  They were awesome.

  • We had clean clothes
  • We had groceries
  • School work was slowly getting done
  • Kids were memorizing their Bible quizzing verses


People would stop by with food and I briefly would think “OH what will they think of the dirty/messy house?”  

You know what they thought?  NOT A THING. 

Friends came to see us not our house.  They were there bless us with a meal and not to pass judgment.  

I mean really who goes to someone’s house who has been sick, had problems or just needs to be loved and thinks “OH Wow!  Her house is terrible.  She must be a bad _______(insert wife, mom, daughter.  Whatever fits)  

But somehow I did think this.  In my crazy mind having a clean house was a test. 

Like I was going to get a medal or something if my house was clean enough.  Approval is sometimes too important to me.

Am I the only one out there that does this?  I have a feeling that I'm not.

Do you put HUGE pressure on yourself to have a picture perfect house?  Well here and now I’m giving you permission to STOP listening to that lie in your head. 

The price of perfection is just not worth it.  Peace is better than Perfection!

There was some pretty high stress in our lives for the past 3 years and we didn't have people over often at all. 

We were in survival mode. 

But despite that I still wanted a clean house & often felt like I was letting my family down when clothes weren't clean or the kitchen was a mess night after night when I went to bed. 

Now does that mean I just threw up my hands and quit cleaning all together?


In past years, we trained our children to clean by areas.  I covered that last week in How I got over my Frustration with a Messy House.  As our family has changed, we've changed our method of cleaning up & maintaining. 

I'll be sharing next week how we currently fight the mess that seems to take over each day.

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